Chemistry Funny Bone Gifts

"Enough helium makes laughing gas."

A Club Sandwitch.

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

An early space launch attempt.

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

'If 'x' is unknown, why should I rock the boat?'

'I did my research paper on Bart Simpson!'

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

Cut out and keep your own Gardener!

'Is it okay to apologize for something I'm going to do?'

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

Excess Baggage: Some folks believe that calories consumed during vacation do not count against your diet.

"She's losing a lot of cream cheese. We're going to have to cut her open."

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

"How do you prepare the chicken?"

"No. I wouldn't 'like to see the cheese menu'. And I don't appreciate the stereotyping!"

"Hiya, hiya, hiya, guy. I'm the bluebird of Prozac."

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

Movers and shakers.

"Care to support the caterers courtesy campaign?" "Do you mind I'm trying to eat!"

"Something that makes me look unfit for human consumption."

Dog at a restaurant

'I'm afraid it's mad cow disease.'

'No, there isn't any shrimp in the 'Shrimp Surprise' -- It's just called that because it's not all that surprising.'

'Hand me that gizmo, will you please?'

"No Eric, you're NOT funny haha. . . you're funny peculiar. . !"

Dave soon realised it was going to be a tough gig.

Birthdays were always better at Mom's.

"Sadly, we're seeing more and more of this as we encroach on their natural habitat."

"Get names!"