Cheeky Foodies Pillows

Todays Special: Vented Spleen.

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

'Hey, honey bun!'

Child praying - asks god to bless his family and the new motorbike he's bought with his father's credit card.

Man visits palm reader with 'Doing Anything Tonight?' written on his hands.

Stand back - while I whip something up

"I do diet...between snacks."

'Coool! What's that called? 'Suicide bomber chicken'?'

'I recommend looking down your wife's top, sir.'

'Oxygen with that swimsuit ma'am?'

"Have you ever licked cream off a woman's body?"

Hot pink (and purple) monkey love!

Thong World.

When I see you I turn to jelly!

"Parrot Fish? Well THAT is going to repeat on me later..."

Beach Burger - without sand 75 cents extra.

"There's a fly in my soup."

Before the smart phone there was the smart mouth.

'What do you fancy? A Zargoid Fliptonian, or a Martian?'

'Low fat, high fiber. We'll come back tonight for the rest of them.'

'If it walks like a duck, and it quacks like a duck, it's a genetically modified potato.'

"It takes the fun out of it when the food police say it's ok."

'For God's sake, Ellie, we're vegetarian.'

Earl thought 'Take Your Daughter to Work Day,' was very dumb. 'How about hot dog ice cream?! Or a hot dog already chewed, saving me time by not chewing it?!'

"Mother's deviling the Easter eggs. Is that sacrilegious?"

ICE CREAM 137 FLAVORS, 'If you just want plain ice cream, sir, you'll have to sign a vanilla waiver.'

Rat with a suggestion for a messy kitchen.

'You can eat anything you want on this diet, but there's a strict limit on what you can swallow.'

"Oh, I don't mind! Anything that tastes like a ten ounce, medium rare, rib-eye steak."

"I like the concept. Like the whole thing. But take out the arches."

I Will Not Chew My Pencil

'What am I wearing? A sheer satin nightgown.'