Charlie Parker Fan Gifts

'That was Charlie Parker's 'Ornithology.' I threw in a flat nine in bar 16 and a tritone substitution in bar 22. Who noticed that? Hands up if you noticed!'

Currently Boston

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

Prehistoric Peeps: Even the 'Derby' had its primeval counterpart.

'They're alright if you like Charlie Chaplin inflight movies.'

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."

"I assume you're on the paleo diet."

Sports Memorabilia: Help wanted-losers need not apply.

Memorials of The Great Exhibition - 1851. No. V. - Theatrical depression.

'This is DESTROYING my manicure, Steve!'

At a silent moment - I don't know Slim, it's quiet.. a little too quiet.

'...and they were carnivorous.'

"You can eat all the cake you want and still get into heaven."

David Ortiz a.k.a Big Papi

I'm sorry sir, store rules. No 'Stairway to Heaven'.

'You have to admit, we do have a strange reproduction strategy.'

"Don't you hate being caught in a civious circle."

It's a major bummer, but on the plus side Paul McCartney gave me his number.

Bees arresting a honey bear.

'Which piece are you going to play?' - 'The Minute Waltz' - '1 minute 9 seconds. Fail.' - 'Damn you, Chopin!'

Led Zeppelin Gig: 'Do you remember when the only drugs we took were dope and Jack Daniels?'

Blind eskimo being guided by a seal.

'I told you I could squeeze into this space!'

How to Save the Los Angeles Dodgers

Sony Dorkman

PacMan brain

'Man's first, best friend'

'Worth a try, but I'm sorry to say the results are not very impressive...'

"Have you ever considered that you haven't been promoted because you're and idiot?"

"Nope, what I had in mind was more of a sort of double helix."

So if I'm hearing you correctly, you drive over broken yellow lines pretending that you're Pac-Man."

Rafa Nadal

Depressed tyrannosaurus rex on a low cholesterol diet

A Packers' Fan During The Offseason.

Early mass transit