Catnip Contemplator Gifts

"I worry that my next 8 lives will be as boring as this one."

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

"I know we've had our differences in the past but if you scratch behind my ears I'll show you where the catnip is kept."

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

Thug life on safari.

'So that we can have a productive meeting, please turn off all phones and put away any catnip toys.'

"MOUSE FLAVORED CAT FOOD"

Cat's golfing with a ball of yarn.

Cat protests, with sign reading 'Legalise catnip!'.

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

"Shhh - he's trying open his third nostril."

Two cats are high off catnip.

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

'We cut it into teensy-weensy squares.'

'What I especially like about being a philosopher-scientist is that I don't have to get my hands dirty.'

"A kitten for your thoughts."

Kitty stoners.

"I put catnip on my homework. I think he'll eat it!"

"... and just a pinch of catnip for Oscar."

"Hello, everyone. My name is Mittens, and I'm addicted to catnip."

"Look at this – New Jersey is legalizing catnip."

'Wow, you really have Tabby excited now! I can almost hear her breathe!'

"I bark, therefore I am."

"Meowzers!"

Meditation for dogs

"Who's going to tell them they didn't invent catnip."

Descartes' Cat - I meow, therefore I am.

'About last night...that wasn't me talking, that was the catnip.'

Alcohol 'Nector of the Gods' 'Devils Brew!'

'I use catnip, too, but only for medical purposes.'

'I only use catnip for medicinal purposes.'

'!!X@#!! Reincarnation!'

'Okay LB... I'll call you next week and we'll do catnip.'