Cat Humor Enthusiast Gifts

"It's a cat calendar, so it may not be all that accurate."

"Curiosity?"

Heaven

"I don't care what they say...they don't really want you to think outside the box."

Cat causes an accident by stopping for mouse.

"I'm afraid you tested positive for catnip"

"Were you on catnip or walking across the keyboard when you wrote this?"

'All right already - I'll change your litter box.'

101 uses of a dead cat: chopping board.

Doug was on the "No Cat List" – but even that didn't stop them.

Inky marks his territory the new and improved way.

101 uses of a dead cat: sun dial.

Cat Nightmares

Man asks haughty looking cat: "And how, exactly, do you qualify as a spokesman for the feline community?"

101 uses of a dead cat: bait

Passive-aggressive Cat

"Try to engage him in meaningful conversation."

Employees must wash paws after using litter box.

"Mmmmm, Millipede! Satisfying meal and cure for the hiccups, all in one."

101 uses of a dead cat: umbrella.

101 uses of a dead cat: sedan chair handles.

'You know, if you cleaned the litter box more often, you wouldn't have to wear the hazmat suit.'

'So to conclude curiosity did indeed kill the cat . . . no wait, it was a dog.'

Kitty and my little joke: 'Food, water, litterbox (TIPS)

101 uses of a dead cat: clamps

Cat laughs at 'Ameowsing Cat Jokes.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: ...Because it's quiet and doesn't eat much.

"Wanna buy some cat poo?"

"You will meet a tall, mysterious stranger — you will rub fur on his pant leg."

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

"I didn't really start applying myself seriously until around the eighth life."

"Projectile hairballing."

"But some of my best ideas come while I'm in the litter box."

'I'm a lap cat. So, naturally I prefer a laptop.'

'Oh no! That's not litter! It's quicksand!!'