Casual Philosopher Gifts

"I do think twice before believing anything I read online. I think, 'Really?' then 'o.k.'."

"Fetch and roll over weren't enough-then they sent me to philosophy classes."

'Sometimes his brain overheats and he needs to cool down with a little bubble time.'

Do you have a problem?. . . Continue on as usual.

'I have trouble sleeping worrying about the alternative minimum tax.'

'It's true that I never fulfilled my early promise of greatness, but I DID manage to catch a lot of really outstanding TV!'

"I'm in the market for an easier religion."

'You can't win - a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but ignorance is no excuse!'

'You seem sceptical.'

'Let there be cool.'

'I'm fighting boredom.' - 'Who's winning?'

'Unfortunately, I don't think you have any real clinical disorders - you just seem to be kind of a lame-ass.'

"I have a thirst for knowledge, but I try not to be too picky."

'Do I believe in evolution? - Well, I suppose we should get it over with.'

"I'm getting a second opinion from Al's Bar and Grill."

'Casual Friday has never caught on here because of eternity.'

'I'm satisfied just being at the top of the food chain.'

I'm not sure if the government is arguing black is white or white is black.

"What's your philosophy of life, Vince?"

"He went doing what he loved."

Born to Potter.

"Yjere didn't seem any point in making any supper..."

"My boss sent my job overseas, and my wife left me for an illegal alien!"

"I think you may need to start seeing me twice a week for a while."

"Well, I finally found God. ... God is really good at Trivial Pursuit."

'Do you ever contemplate life's big questions?"

"I've tried Buddhism, Taoism, Transendental meditation, Confucionism, Theolog, Scientgology....but I've found a good hand rolled joint of homegrown works best!"

"I rushed into the battle of the sexes without a plan for winning the peace!"

"Actually, I like having to go outside to smoke. It's an opportunity to get some fresh air."

Tavern: Diluting The Reality of Your Meaningless Existence Since 1967!

"After a life of sin, what will you say when you meet the devil?"

"The hair on my back - will it go back to my head?"

"I'm so bored. I bet everyone else is engaging in creative hobbies or having great sex!!"

"Everything is just hunky-dory."

"The price of oil is rising because of the Russians? Well, I don't care as long as they don't fool around with the price of vodka."