Castle Quester Gifts

"We'll settle this the old-fashioned way - with a dance-off."

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

"Do me next."

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

Homo Gamus

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

"Whosoever slays this dragon may marry the princess."

"What the hell took so long?"

"This makes Pamplona seem like child's play."

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

"Hurry up with that dictionary!"

Gamers

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

'I think they're up to something.'

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

'The knights are drawing closer'

"Is 'family' friend of foe?"

"His Excellency the Lord Premier Gooboy."

Welcome Ghost.

"Bob, the whole Cupid thing is a metaphor."

Clearing the castle's moat.

Knight sees sign near castle: 'Prince's Parking, All Others Will Be Toad.'

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

'You might want to try another photographer, Sire. This one tends to cut the heads off.'

Knight walking a dog.

'Oh dear, Hamlet seems to have developed turrets syndrome.'

"And to think he started in accounting."

Castle Efficiency

"Put on a tie. We've been invited to the castle."

Non discrimination to Vampires

Grimm's Fairytales - The Golden Bird