Casino Owner Gifts

'Should we open a casino in our hotel?'... 'It'll be a gamble.'

Casino Desk Organizer

Entering Washington, District of Trump. Friday is casino night!"

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

Cut Price

Fast food. Even faster food

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

Today's special... donuts.

Mac's Bait and Sushi Shop

Try to guess the continent dining...

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

Kitchen Kapers

Shaken not stirred

Beer Stall

"A pint! I'll need proof, and that's human years, not dog years!"

"This is our soft opening."

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

Hashimoto's Restaurant - Sushi Like Mother Used to Make!

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

'I don't like to take chances.'

"The food isn't bad, but I don't care much for the floor show!"