Casino Owner Gifts

'Should we open a casino in our hotel?'... 'It'll be a gamble.'

Casino Desk Organizer

Entering Washington, District of Trump. Friday is casino night!"

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

Cut Price

Fast food. Even faster food

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

Today's special... donuts.

Mac's Bait and Sushi Shop

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

Try to guess the continent dining...

"Something romantic, perhaps?"

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

Kitchen Kapers

"I understand this diner has quite a reputation."

Hashimoto's Restaurant - Sushi Like Mother Used to Make!

Desert $2.75. See? -- It wasn't a typo.

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

Beer Stall

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

Shaken not stirred

"This is our soft opening."