Tavern Owner Gifts

Joe's Bar, Under New Joe!

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

"A pint! I'll need proof, and that's human years, not dog years!"

Shaken not stirred

Beer Stall

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"... And to this day, she still blames the dog!"

It's our new twin-handle beer mug. It's for manly, two-fisted drinkers, as well as weaklings like you who can't lift it with one hand.

"Have you seen my dad?"

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

"Stranger, you're sitting in the boss's personal spot. That's why they moved the dart board over your head."

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

The Reaper's Arms

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

'I'm sorry, we don't serve spirits.'

Now Playing at the Europlex

'Bartender...There's soap in my beer glass!' - Man farting bubbles.

Bar: Now serving 24 hours - 'I want to get as wasted as you look.'

Infinity Tavern

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

Buy one beer, get one free. If I may paraphrase a famous quote, "Beer is proof that God has mixed feelings about us and wants us to be hungover."

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

Ale. Mead. It's been a hard knight's day!

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'

Greatest hits, Greatest Misses.

Guitar pickin'

Dinner at the Jolly Sandboys (opening to Ch 19)

'I grew sick of Madison Avenue,so I quit,bought the bar and never looked back.'