Hotel Owner Gifts

"As the owner of a hotel chain, I found being shipwrecked quite a challenge."

"Don't be silly!He's the doorman"

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

'That's our mission statement.'

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

A fight in the Boardroom.

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

'Shhhh. Fido inherited seventy percent of this company.'

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

Fast food. Even faster food

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

'Office' block tightening it's belt

Cut Price

6 Brothers Falafel

'Do you have any catsup?'

Bank Loan Dept. Personal Business. Uh-oh, some loans have gone bad! A tennis pro defaulted and a novelist is in Chapter 7. The bed linens company folded and the scuba school went under! Are any of our loans still good? Yeah, the music streaming service is totally sound! And ironically, the lighting company is in the black!

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'We're like family. I look out for them. They look out for me.'

"Read our contracts, Ms Donahue. It says 'No Sexual Harassment on the workfloor!'"

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'