Carb-conscious Creator Gifts

'Sorry, no carbs.'

"We only got six days of funding."

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

"It's ideal for the man who works close to home."

'McWit, that's not what's meant by carbo loading.'

"We were looking for a non-hackable, energy efficient data center. Thanks for the file cabinet."

The big pause

'I understand the concept, sir, but I think I'd do better if it were a donut.'

"Got anything else? I gave up carbs."

Complex Carbohydrates

Complex Carbs

'With such a tight budget we never thought it would be possible to build our dream home.'

The Penultimate Temptation of Christ

'The automatic doors won't open.' 'Your carbon footprints are too light.'

"That reminds me, your Dentist called."

Crusty Bread

"One gluten-free, lactose-free, low carb pizza."

'My wife's an ecology nut. What can you suggest that hasn't contributed to pollution at any time during its manufacture?'

"I thought you were trying to go carb-free?"

'Dad, the wine's been put into used barrels, just like you ordered. I got a great deal on them from Exxon.'

'Not that we don't appreciate the popcorn, but how about something low-carb next time?'

Bad Carbs

"Pasta-nonymous Tuesdays & Thursdays. Unlimited breadsticks at 7."

'We'll have to be more aggressive with your diet. I'd like to try something I call 'The Carbivore''.

"But Dear, there were no fat people before bread was invented!"

'Raymond, do you really love me or just my low-carbohydrate meat?'

'Not only can we build it for the same price as any other gingerbread house.. but we can do it for 40 LESS CARBS!'

"I'm taking you off sugar, carbs, red meat, poultry, dairy, non-dairy and anything served in a bucket."

"Upcycled, re-purposed and resin dipped - that's how gran would have wanted to go."