Car Tester Gifts

'It's official - seventy miles per gallon.'

Once again, the texting dummy has missed the wall.

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

Rust test in progress.

"If all you have is a whatchamacallit then every problem looks like a thingamajig."

Product Testing Department

Former Auto Crash Dummy. Replaced By Driverless Car.

'We couldn't find anything wrong with your car, so all you owe us is for 2 hours of search.'

The Sex life of a Driving Test Examiner, "Thank you. I will not ask you to perform that manoeuvre again."

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'

"Yep, she's gonna cost ya—your microprocessor's shot."

"Don't let this one take any cars out for a test-drive!"

Disoriented while talking on his cell phone, Pat made a series of wrong turns in the unfamiliar office park.

'Have you tried turning it off and on again?'

'The new helium airbag was a mistake.'

No one liked working the red-eye shift.

Crash Test Dummy Funerals.

'They're not like popsickles, Sir. . . they're just too warm and syrupy.'

"I won't go near one of those driver-less things until they iron out the bugs."

I'm a seat warmer test dummy.

"Right I've checked everything 6 times. Surely nothing can go wrong this time."

"She says she's from Quality Control. We've failed the furniture inspection."

Car dealer's sign: If you kick the tires, you've bought it!

'Which' Consumer Testing Whiskies

Crash Test Dummy Denied Insurance.

Test dummies in car, "Oh my god dave, look out for that wall!"

Wall.

At the National Whoopee Cushion Testing Facility.

"You'd think they'd at least offer health insurance with this job."

'So how was work, Honey?'

'It doesn't work...'

At the Flip-Flop Quality Control Center.

"An example of my game cheat skills is that I hacked into your computer and invited myself to this games tester interview."