Vehicle Tester Gifts

More professional training required for SUVs

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

Rust test in progress.

Product Testing Department

Cardiologist/Truckdiologist: Medical help for Trucks.

Former Auto Crash Dummy. Replaced By Driverless Car.

Crash test dummy employee of the month.

'We couldn't find anything wrong with your car, so all you owe us is for 2 hours of search.'

The Sex life of a Driving Test Examiner, "Thank you. I will not ask you to perform that manoeuvre again."

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'

"Don't let this one take any cars out for a test-drive!"

Disoriented while talking on his cell phone, Pat made a series of wrong turns in the unfamiliar office park.

'The new helium airbag was a mistake.'

No one liked working the red-eye shift.

"She says she's from Quality Control. We've failed the furniture inspection."

Car dealer's sign: If you kick the tires, you've bought it!

'Which' Consumer Testing Whiskies

'So how was work, Honey?'

"You'd think they'd at least offer health insurance with this job."

'Now I know why this Satnav was going out cheap.'

'It doesn't work...'

Crash Test Dummy Denied Insurance.

Test dummies in car, "Oh my god dave, look out for that wall!"

"Check the catalytic converter while you're in there, please."

"Any accidents within the last twelve months?"

"If you didn't like your job, you should go into ventriloquism like your brother."

MOT Emissions Test: Pass/Fail.

"You're the perfect man for our production test lab, sir!"