Automobile Tester Gifts

Test Dummy. Test Idiot. I locked the keys in the car again.

Safety dummies parents with child 'And this is our little accident'

"You'd think they'd at least offer health insurance with this job."

"Got a gig in automotive safety, and you. . .?"

'My electric car is giving me static!'

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

'This is Onstar, how may I help you?'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

"So this is what you want? This is why after school, almost every day, you spend all your extra free time working at the auto store?"

'I think I've isolated that funny noise you've been having.'

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

'You got clowns in your engine. That's what's making them funny noises.'

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

"It took a lot of work to build this car..."

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

You were fixing cars in your sleep again.

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

"If all you have is a whatchamacallit then every problem looks like a thingamajig."

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

"Is that one of those cars that tells you when it needs maintenance?"

"Nap time."

'Have you tried hitting Ctrl-Alt-Delete?'

'We couldn't find anything wrong with your car, so all you owe us is for 2 hours of search.'

'Sorry, pastor, your soul's grace period is eternity, your car's is six minutes.'

'Difficulty getting started in the morning, stalling, various leaks, gas fumes...at this point Mrs Johnson, I'd recommend getting a new husband!'

He did love tinkering on his cars.

Former Auto Crash Dummy. Replaced By Driverless Car.

22. Being tireless is good trait to have in most jobs, but not when you're working on a pit crew.

"See that dog, Mr. Hendricks? That means you either have a shredded fan belt or your fuel pump is sucking air."

The Sex life of a Driving Test Examiner, "Thank you. I will not ask you to perform that manoeuvre again."

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'