Car Techie Gifts

"Our electric car is good for Frank. It's replaced his road rage with range anxiety."

"Usually when someone claims they've installed the latest technology, it means more than just power windows."

'My electric car is giving me static!'

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

'This is Onstar, how may I help you?'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'I think I've isolated that funny noise you've been having.'

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

"So this is what you want? This is why after school, almost every day, you spend all your extra free time working at the auto store?"

Organic Soldering.

Turmoil change.

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

'You got clowns in your engine. That's what's making them funny noises.'

"It took a lot of work to build this car..."

"I'd like my daughter to know something about engines."

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

'My husband thought he could save money by repairing it himself.'

'Your car should run fine now. I reformatted the hard drive, increased the ram, scanned for viruses, updated the firmware, upgraded to this year's processor...'

Animals are smarter than we think!

'It's a kit I found online. I converted the car so it runs entirely on chicken manure.'

A souped up car...

You were fixing cars in your sleep again.

Nice park. . .

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

"If they can rig emissions tests, why can't they fake crash tests too?"

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.