Car Restoration Gifts

'Orville keeps bragging about restoring that car. He fails to tell people it took him 70 years.'

Faulty car.

'I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm giving you a ticket for not speeding, but driving too slow.'

"Wow! This car has a continental kit, train horn, smoothed-out firewall, polyurethane bushings and a 2400-CFM fan! I have a long way to go!"

'I spent 20 years restoring this car. it's a beaut, huh, son? Can you think of anything better?'

'This is a classic, a gem! Years went into perfecting it!'

'What can you possible see in this piece of junk?'

"Baldo, this is a special month...a time to reflect on your past, your present, your future."

"What old school? This is my life."

"I hear you bought a new classic car."

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'A 50's vintage automobile...a billiards room. YOu, my firend, have got it all.'

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

'It's a British car. Needs braces.'

"When was the last time you started her up?"

"Let me guess...you got a job here because you needed new parts for your lowrider project?"

"Murchison’s theory is that it’s dog hair in your fuel line.”

'It's up for adoption. Just pay to have it fixed.'

Man at Muffler Shop sees door sign: 'Exhausted'.

'The only parts that don't need replacing are the 'fluffy dice'.'

"I know there's nothing wrong with the carburetor. I'm just interested in the stories it has to tell."

My dad loves his motor.

"So...how do you like our quality father-son time?"

"That's the problem with imports. Most of them come from another country."

'It only takes a minute to erect the hood, or five minutes if the family helps.'

Spray painter.

'Before I give you the bill, I'm supposed to ask if you'd like me to buy you dinner first.'

'Oops-sie.' (Car jacked through the ceiling).

"So, it's not the battery then."

Garage "Now then, squire, what would you like first - the bad news, or the really, really bad news?"

'The full history includes all the original letters of complaint to the factory.'

"After thirty years, that old car of mine is still on the road."

Truck Repairs