Cannabis Aficionado Gifts

Nobody warned Marge that a side effect of a hip replacement is feeling more hippy.

"I don't prescribe opioids, but feel free to grab a CBD-laced lollipop on your way out."

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

"Manna's good for the munchies."

"Do you have a strain that pairs well with Chunky Monkey?"

'...and if you want to buy marijuana, just press the hash key!'

"I won't be in today, I've got a swollen joint."

"And I offset the electricity I use by planting more cannabis."

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

Bribes for Jabs

"It's God's country, if your god wears camouflage and dips tobacco."

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

"Remember that '70s TV show 'What's Happening'!? Did they ever come up with an answer?" "I don't know, but it makes me wonder if Marvin Gaye found out what's going on." "The black hole of cannabis-induced queries"

'I started as an office boy and growled my way to the top.'

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

'You use HERBS to help you levitate? - How does THAT work?'

"Really? You mean you’ve never smoked a joint?"

Pelobong

"Since I've gone over to roll-ups I find I can get by on just one cigarette a day!"

"There is a medical use for marijuana. I sold it to pay my tuition at medical school."

Old men,"I have terrible trouble with my joints..the cannabis keeps falling out."

'Stocks are down. Bonds are down. Terrorism and natural disasters are up. Ask your doctor if medical marijuana is right for you...'

'Take two tokes of weed, Mrs Grunfield, and call me in the morning.'

"He's been like that ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

"All agreed? We buy low and sell high."

"You come highly recommended. I like that."

"Medical marijuana hotline...press hash to continue."

José Saramago

"Nah, dude, I'm Tokey Bear. Smokey's on vacation. Hey you got any snacks?"

Cannabis Dispensary: Walk-ins awkwardly trying to look nonchalant welcome!

Hippie Edibles Co.

"Compliments of the chef - Our finest blend of 'Maui Wowie' dated 1972."

Portrait of Shakespeare smoking.