Cannabis Culture Aficionado Gifts

"I am the Genie of the Bong! I will grant you... um... I am the Genie of the Bong!"

Big Bong Theory

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

Bribes for Jabs

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

"Remember that '70s TV show 'What's Happening'!? Did they ever come up with an answer?" "I don't know, but it makes me wonder if Marvin Gaye found out what's going on." "The black hole of cannabis-induced queries"

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

Pelobong

"There is a medical use for marijuana. I sold it to pay my tuition at medical school."

"Really? You mean you’ve never smoked a joint?"

Old men,"I have terrible trouble with my joints..the cannabis keeps falling out."

'Stocks are down. Bonds are down. Terrorism and natural disasters are up. Ask your doctor if medical marijuana is right for you...'

'Take two tokes of weed, Mrs Grunfield, and call me in the morning.'

"Compliments of the chef - Our finest blend of 'Maui Wowie' dated 1972."

"He's been like that ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

"Nah, dude, I'm Tokey Bear. Smokey's on vacation. Hey you got any snacks?"

Cannabis Dispensary: Walk-ins awkwardly trying to look nonchalant welcome!

"All agreed? We buy low and sell high."

Hippie Edibles Co.

"Medical marijuana hotline...press hash to continue."

"You come highly recommended. I like that."

'Join us. There' a talk on medical marijuana and a pot-luck dinner afterward.'

Nobody warned Marge that a side effect of a hip replacement is feeling more hippy.

Caterpillar Paranoia

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

"I take it you'l like to open joint accounts. . ."

"Could you give me enough medicinal cannabis so that I forget about Brexit?"

"Remember the night in the Tetons when we smoked so much weed we thought we were hallucinating?"

"My joints... are almost done"

"I've tried Buddhism, Taoism, Transendental meditation, Confucionism, Theolog, Scientgology....but I've found a good hand rolled joint of homegrown works best!"

'I'm asking for a transfer to California because that's where you get the really good stuff.'

"Say, Bill, how's that new crop of yours doing?"

As a doctor I can only tell you that the jury is still out as regards the benefits of cannabis in a medical context,however it is my personal opinion that this particular sample would make one bitchin spliff.