Canine Comedian Appreciator Gifts

"I hate it when he gets all Robin Williamsy."

"Next time make two trips."

'I don't care what you say...I heard him snicker!'

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"No no, I said sit!!"

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

Lactose Intolerant

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

"He's no hat and all corgis."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"I was almost that last year."

Tiny dog catches frisbee that spins him around in circles.

Cat and mouse

"Say hello to my little friend."

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

No Soliciting

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

Obedience School Graduation

His Master's Thesis.

'I'd like to return this, please.'

Dogs life

Woman leaves dog in rain...he gets into a car to wait in the dry.

"The article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that."

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

'Oh, oh, a pack of dogs! Stand still amd maybe they won't notice us.'