Campfire Strategists Gifts

Accountants around the campfire.

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

Desert Island BBQ

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

Harsh Mellows.

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

'Dad! Dad! Dad!!. . . We lost our signal.'

'I don't remember this canoe being this heavy, do you Tom?'

Roasting the Moneybox

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

'Marshmallows ready! Now for the roasting...'

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

"Okay lets go. You can message your friends after dinner."

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

Flash Cuisine

"This one's really scary. It's about what's happening to my 401k."

'Heidegger-Hi!'

"and when they woke up, the kids discovered that the house had just one 19", black & white TV that only got... 3 channels."

"Let me take you back to a dark time when all you could do with a phone was make phone calls."

Have food. Need toilet paper

Creepy Camp Stories.

"You were right, Louis. . . I was cold before, but now it's warm and toasty."

Nobody likes a smore loser

"He must be a pro. He's got his own stick."

"Well, they look friendly enough."

'Is the fire included?'

'This will teach them to clean up after themselves after they camp in our woods!'