Camera Crew Gifts

Broom Operators Deserve Better

"You're beating him senseless, but what you really want is his approval."

Two reporters interview each other.

"They say she's gone completely Sundance."

'Great! So that's the film... Now for the sound!'

'People sometimes do the weirdest things when there's a camera around...and sometimes they don't.'

Journalist murder.

"Cut! And that's a wrap."

Journalists block an ambulance crew.

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

If nobody had invented graphics

Cut!

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

Movie Awards. Winner. It's been a big night for Ernie! He won three times at the movie-set caterer awards! On one set he made a healthy, refreshing beverage that received rave reviews from the cast and crew. He won the "best pitcher" award for it. Did they say he won for best costumes? No, his dressings won. His sticky buns won also. For "best leading roll" performance, right? No, for best "cinnamontography"!

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

Local News in Heaven

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

Next camera crew 5 mins

Police film evidence

"Your motivation is that you're a dog and it's food."

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

As you can see, media coverage at this event is very heavy...

Hollywood producer.

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

So, Leo catches me, devours me...wears make up?"

"And then I said, 'They're not Christians, they're Easter Worshippers!' Cause we can't say the 'C' word out. . ."

True Story Movie

News Headline Reads - 'Man Bites Feral Media'.