Calmness Aficionado T-Shirts

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

Need an elevated state of mind too!

Introducing Ambient Books: No beginning...no middle...no end...just a bunch of sentences specially written to soothe and relax the reader.

'I can remember when no one had even heard of t'ai chi.'

"She's been in shavasana for - like - a really long time...."

When mediation failed, they tried meditation.

'Wait til you see what fishing does for your nerves, Alice.'

'Please join me now in a group meditation.'

"You can tell us the sound of one hand clapping here, or you can tell us downtown."

Relax.

'Calm down darling... now what do you mean the tortoise has gone berserk?'

'So, your anger management class is working?'

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

'I feel wired. I want to feel wireless.'

"I used to be a young crazy rebel like you you know."

Sea of Tranquillity

"See what I mean? People don't know how to relax anymore."

'Fred's a lot more relaxed since he began viewing life as just another spectator sport.'

"You claim on your résumé that one of your skills is staying calm under stressful situations. I believe you."

"Now, now, let's try using our NPR voice."

'I wish I could be as calm as JB when it comes to making decisions.'

'Before we begin may I emit a prolonged rant about my work week?

Chameleon. Calmer Chameleon. Calmer Calmer Calmer Calmer Calmer Chameleon.

"But otherwise I'll bet they lead very dull lives."

'All I said was - chill out don't flap!'

Consternation/Control

"My philosophy has always been 'Don't sweat the small stuff -- it's all small stuff!'"

The Zen of Regulation

"This is sheer bloody mindfulness."

'I'm shaking a bit!'