Calmness Aficionados T-Shirts

"I'm not going to panic until the guy who leaves our groceries outside our door tells us to panic."

The end of summer is near and you still haven't made plans

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

Need an elevated state of mind too!

America Off-line.

Introducing Ambient Books: No beginning...no middle...no end...just a bunch of sentences specially written to soothe and relax the reader.

"She's been in shavasana for - like - a really long time...."

When mediation failed, they tried meditation.

'Wait til you see what fishing does for your nerves, Alice.'

'Please join me now in a group meditation.'

"You can tell us the sound of one hand clapping here, or you can tell us downtown."

Relax.

'So, your anger management class is working?'

'Calm down darling... now what do you mean the tortoise has gone berserk?'

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

"I used to be a young crazy rebel like you you know."

'I feel wired. I want to feel wireless.'

Sea of Tranquillity

'Fred's a lot more relaxed since he began viewing life as just another spectator sport.'

Calm in the Face of Chaos

"You claim on your résumé that one of your skills is staying calm under stressful situations. I believe you."

"I'm glad you're not one of those sharks that has to swim all the time."

"No, there's nothing wrong at my job. That's what's got me worried."

"Is something bothering you?"

"Now, now, let's try using our NPR voice."

'I wish I could be as calm as JB when it comes to making decisions.'

'Before we begin may I emit a prolonged rant about my work week?

Chameleon. Calmer Chameleon. Calmer Calmer Calmer Calmer Calmer Chameleon.

'It's SUPPOSED to be quiet up here!'

'All I said was - chill out don't flap!'

Consternation/Control