Calendar Whiz Gifts

Sadie, I just heard something disturbing, and I think you're the only one who can tell me whether it's true. Youtube is telling me I've lived 300 years of phantom time. Pope Gregory XIII's math was off when he created our calendar, and this is actually the year 1717. What's more, the Middle Ages is just a fiction the pope created to explain his rounding error. You were there, Sadie ... did King Arthur really exist? I'll tell you about that nice boy, as soon as I demonstrate how we dealt with her

An awkward moment at CES 2013.

"He can see you around 2024-ish."

The first car accident.

"Baxter...about this report...your punctuation, spelling and grammar are perfect. No one can understand it!"

'If your calculations are correct, this completely revolutionizes everything we thought we knew about why chalk squeaks on a blackboard!'

'Maths is fun!'

Math Teacher

"Gee, thanks! What rate of interest does it pay?"

It appears to be some sort of computer virus.

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it.

The Invention of the Wheel

'In a Washington economic summit, a panel of three economists offered two dozen opinions about the direction of global economics.'

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

A2+B2=C2, 'Are you sure you're not just making this stuff up?'

'I need both hands for steering.'

Apex Dictionaries Co - sign reads: Clowsed,bak at too.

"We're restructuring - Wednesday moves to Friday, Tuesday becomes Wednesday, Monday stays where it is and Thursday and Friday will be merged with the weekend."

'You should have been here last quarter when his earnings estimate was off by two cents, instead of one.'

'Hey! -- I invented that, too!', 'It's that nut Al-Gor again.'

"We can't just pluck figures out of the air any more. . . We use a bucket."

'This is just the first step -- next, I invent the Teamsters' Union!'

'I cam for your obsolete operating system.'

If I move Jen's ortho to Friday, it conflicts with Sam's clarinet, but I can't move that to Monday because Tina has soccer! Ugh, how do I line this thing up? Rubik's Calendar.

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

Um... Can I get an 'L', Pat?

Innumerate accounts department

First Speeding Fine.

Millipede motorist

"Bangin’ rims. Sears?"

"Wow! - Record climate emergency in Western Canada!. . ."

"Be rational."