Calculus Addict Gifts

'Maths is fun!'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

Math Dreams

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

'I have to agree -- the value of pie goes on indefinitely.'

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

"I was planning to grow old with Matthew Nelson, but it looks like I'll be growing old with my algebra teacher."

Graduation Speech.

Jewish Geometry

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

'Yeah, I don't have trouble remembering my times tables, but I stink at algebra...'

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

"Where the hell's my pocket calculator?"

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

"I love the equation that describes the slope of your nose."

"We feel you're over analyzing things a bit too much."

"Well, I can't figure it out either. Do we know anyone that can help us with math homework?"

"Sit and stay were no problem but she's hit a wall with multivariable calculus.'

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

'I forgave ya for puttin' 'em all in one basket, but this goes too far!'

'I've discovered a talking amoeba!' '2+2=4, 5-4=1, 93=3.' SMASH 'I wanted to get it before it multiplied.'

I love maths.

'By the second week of instruction all first-graders should be able to count to one.'

'Remember, a breakthrough is not a breakthrough unless you have some good P.R. for it.'

The Math Institute √π*962.9 KM