Calculation Enthusiast Gifts

"It's the old story. I was in the middle of successful acting career when I was bitten by the accounting bug."

I love maths.

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

"Wow! My calculations show that on Christmas night, Santa Claus will visit 1 house every .83 seconds!"

'You'll find that math gets easier as you learn how to use a calculator.'

Math Dreams

"15 bucks a piece should cover it, gentlemen."

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

'Calculus is my new Versace. I get a buzz from algorithms. What's going on with me, Raymond? I'm scared.'

Mathematicians erase equation.

"I'm thinking of a number between (3x2)=6 and (7x9)-(8x2)."

"But it's helping me learn my math!"

"I got 75 percent right on my math test!"

"This is your great, great uncle Orlando. He was a great mathematician, but a little cheap. He always picked up the check at restaurants...but only to make sure the math was right."

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Albert Einstein

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

'But I digress...'

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

"Is it that bad?"

'If you're so smart, why don't you have some Index Funds in your portfolio?'

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

Professor Wiles grows insufferable.

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."