Burger Scientist Gifts

'He's a prodigy all right, but all his work deals with subjects such as the elasticity of bubble gum, the decibel limits of rock records and the molecular content of a cheeseburger.'

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

'You need an education or you will wind up in some fast food place.'

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

"He says that when he had a vegetable salad as an appetizer, he can now have burgers, pizza and Coke as a reward."

Nutrition-Free Diet

The proper term for our special promotion is Triple Cheeseburger with a Gazillion fries...not the triple bypass special!

Lightest beer on the market. Carbonated with helium.

Calorie averaging...With the oven-fresh trip-el burger, you get one French fry.

'I am the ghost of Christmas future...with fries!'

Shortly Thereafter, They Would Make Sweeping Changes To Their Policies.

'Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun.'

'I'd like to order, please.' - 'Okay, what's your table number?' - 'I don't know.' - 'Find it, weak-minded fool!!' - 'What's our table number?' - 'There is no table number.' - 'There is no table number.' - 'You should have been assigned a table number whe

"So that's a triple burger with added cheese and relish... Would you like the complementary angioplasty with that?"

Big Burgers.

Big Boy Foot

"We can serve a rare handburger, but because of health regulations, this room will have to be heated to 160 degrees."

Bank 'n' Burger

"Gimme a double burger between two burgers. And hold the lettuce; it only dilutes the experience."

Mc Seven

"Why is that? Are you not confident that you'd be able to do it properly?"

'Eating again. What's happened to your weight lifting?'

'I'm sorry, sir, but cheeseburgers are out of season.'

'I don't want bread crumbs. I'd prefer some money to buy a cheeseburger.'

"Our cook is working through a lot of stuff."

"I think I'm falling in love."

'And finally, sir, would you like your burger flipped by a Ph.D. in Philosophy, History or English Literature?'