Budget-conscious Buyer Gifts

'On the positive side, just think how small the mortgage payments will be.'

'These shipping crates are more in line with our budget.'

Wine Prices

Basic Shelter.

Garage Music

'I'm sorry, but all we have in your price range are a few bales of hay.'

"THREE quid for a romantic verse? Don't you have any snappy one liners for 50p.?"

Quicksand Swamp - Cheap Burial Plots.

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

Sale.

Crisis Buzz.

"Got any cards saying friendship is priceless under 5 bucks?"

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

Doctor's profits match a patient's scar.

"You've got two more things to worry about now. You're mad and I'm expensive."

"This is a third-year medical student. To cut costs, your insurance company dismissed the surgeon."

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

Take one Per Day as Affordable.

Rx. Warning: May cause sudden loss of income.

'If the 750ml and th 375ml of the '82 Beaumont are too pricey, how about their Merlot-scented auto air freshener? -- Only 99 cents.'

Low income vampires.

"That fly paper's paid for itself."

'All I said was,two could live as cheaply as one until you gave up dieting.'

Sam's Nation Building

Affordable housing

A Room (with adequate light and ventilation, no psychotic neighbors, near a grocery store, in a halfway-decent building in an O.K. neighborhood [not Queens, please God] for under $2000 a month) of One's Own

'Jim gets a powerful charge from electric cars but always gets burned by the sticker shock.'

"Our goal is to make prices so low that even our employees could shop here."

Avocado Prices

Senior Brand Name Medicine Cabinet

'Computer Prices' blowing away you money

"Natasha cuts diagnosis costs."

Dad she's fallen into the cereal again!