Budget Busters Gifts

'We're running over budget. Better board up all the other windows, too.'

"Hi, Mr. Tepper. This is the I.R.S. Say, back in April, when you paid your tax, we had no idea of the sort of bills Uncle Sam would be running up, and-well, the long and the short of it is that we have to soak you again."

'No way, man! Murphy isn't worth anywhere near the 3.5 million they're paying him!'

"It's tough being in Congress these days...I keep telling people we've cut all we can cut...there's just no more waste!"

"When we got married, you said we'd be in the lap of luxury...but here we are, in the butt of bankruptcy!"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

What's wrong with the computer you've got?"

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

Turkish Democracy

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

Budget Bureau. Ernie, spilling something from every food group on it, does not make it a "balanced" budget!

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

'Item 56, we need to schedule a series of meetings to discuss whether we should have meeting to look at whether we're having too many meetings.'

"Hey, honey, the credit card company increased our debt... I mean our credit limit!"

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

Bureaucrats held up by the workers.

'I'm afraid we can't deliver your baby until your CRB check comes through.'

'We're cutting back on our legal expenses and going with the violence instead.'

"This is crazy! We've been here only 10 minutes, we've spent all our money, and we've got nothing to show for it!"

City Centre Development - "...We've spent all the money on the model."

'Uh oh. I can see another few hundred will be added to your bid.'

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

'My firm has scrutinised your budget and determined you could save a fortune by sacking us...that'll be £300,000 please!'

Oil shock.

'Man, I've bought heaps on my credit card this month...It always amazes me...How many things I'd rather have than money.'

Horror Theater. Now Playing. Return of the Deficit.

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

Yes, dear, I remembered the coupons and saved a few dollars. The Adventures of Marriedman.

"The industry has agreed to take the pensions dashboard off our hands. . ."

'What if we televise government budget hearings and make them pay-per-view?'