Budget Breaker Gifts

'You gave the Research & Development guys an unlimited budget--and they exceeded it.'

Victim of Overdraft Charges

"Dad's doing that thing again!"

'Man, I've bought heaps on my credit card this month...It always amazes me...How many things I'd rather have than money.'

Parents happy that student has dropped out of university.

"What comes after the word 'trillion'?"

"I never saved for a rainy day...I grew up shopping in an enclosed mall!"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'Let's not go by the book.'

'No swimming. No breathing.'

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

Woman's Support Group: No Bra, No Griddle, No Service.

Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

'The government's right. Not counting, food, clothing, energy, shelter, health care, or transportation, inflation is hardly going up.'

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

'I shoulda told you guys. . . Marmaduke makes up his own rules as we go along.'

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

Budget Bureau. Ernie, spilling something from every food group on it, does not make it a "balanced" budget!

Walk or don't. You're a grown man. Make your own decisions.

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

To attract a bigger audience, the world chess federation allow fans to distract an opponent when it's his move.

'Don't be so dramatic and get into my office!'

"Hey, honey, the credit card company increased our debt... I mean our credit limit!"

"Worst breach of corporate dress code I've ever witnessed."

'Hey, hey, hey!'

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

'Read that last part back to me.'