Budgeting Buster Gifts

Bank. Statements and Accounts. I stretched my holiday budget so much this year, it snapped back and flattened me.

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Gerry, there are more accurate ways of balancing the petty cash.

What's wrong with the computer you've got?"

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

"You're a fine one to talk about my spending!"

Budget Bureau. Ernie, spilling something from every food group on it, does not make it a "balanced" budget!

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

Fuel bill gone through the roof

"Your expense account ain't what it used to be. There's not enough money on your card to cover the $5.35."

"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% budget allocation."

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

Investing your savings

"Hey, honey, the credit card company increased our debt... I mean our credit limit!"

"We balanced our budget this month!"

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

"What comes after zillion?"

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

'Well I've finished the project on time and on budget!' 'Oh, that means I've given you too much time and too much money!'

'We're cutting back on our legal expenses and going with the violence instead.'

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"This is crazy! We've been here only 10 minutes, we've spent all our money, and we've got nothing to show for it!"

Blowing dust off an order book.

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

'With 5% spent on talent, 5% on production, and 90% on marketing...I smell WINNER!'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

'My firm has scrutinised your budget and determined you could save a fortune by sacking us...that'll be £300,000 please!'

'Uh oh. I can see another few hundred will be added to your bid.'

City Centre Development - "...We've spent all the money on the model."

"So, the bills still aren't paid? You've never been good at money management."

Yes, dear, I remembered the coupons and saved a few dollars. The Adventures of Marriedman.