Budgeting Buff Gifts

-"I finished the project on time and on budget!" -"Right, next project you get less time and less money!"

Cutting corners can cost money.

-"Why bother to budget?" -"So we can worry BEFORE we spend our money as well as AFTER we spend our money."

'It was hard enough making ends meet when it was just the two of us. Now we have a baby and suddenly there's four more stomachs to feed.'

'That's not in addition to your pension, that IS your pension.'

'I'm afraid at times like this with overstretched budgets we all have to make sacrifices...'

'Ooops! My mistake! That was the yearly budget estimate, not the monthly budget estimate.'

'I see we went with the lowest bidder for an aerial photo contract.'

"What comes after zillion?"

"And finally doctor, can you think of any areas where spending could be cut without damaging patiet care?"

Office of Management and Budget and Mandatory Cuts

"We can probably just about afford to run the pilot-light."

'I'm having trouble supporting a wife and a government on the same salary.'

'I've calculated that we've enough money for 2013 if we cancel February.'

'Nuts, every pen in the house is our of ink.' 'Well, we're out of money too. Maybe it's divine providence to keep us from being overdrawn.' 'Or it could just be lousy pens.'

"I think this new financial controller is going to be trouble..."

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

Because of our tightening budget, I had to turn off the lights at the end of the tunnel.

'My cash flow? It flows right out of my hands to my creditors.'

"You can live high, or you can live mighty. You can't afford to live high and mighty."

'Since this luncheon meeting is about preventing waste, we're having leftovers.'

Another victim of the coronavirus

'Granted, our net worth is zero but look at how easy the bookkeeping is.'

'With 5% spent on talent, 5% on production, and 90% on marketing...I smell WINNER!'

'These gas prices are outrageous! Almost as expensive as bottled water!'

'We devised a household budget and forgot to include a clothing allowance.'

'Make up your mind! -- Do you want me to balance our budget or our checkbook?'

'Hopefully these sessions will help you to adjust to flying economy.'

'Now what we have to remember is this is a game of four quarters.'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

'We're so heavily in debt, our goal is to get back to broke.'

I already checked, sir. There's no accountant under your bed.

'As a precaution, we're equipped with defibrillators for when people open their post-holiday Christmas bills.'

Financial Advisor. How would you describe your income and outgo? Instant conversion.

'How did your meeting with your insurance company go?'