Budget Solutions Buff Gifts

Unable to afford radar, the city keeps drivers honest with a blowdryer.

What's wrong with the computer you've got?"

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

'On the plus side we've saved money by getting all the numbers on one graph.'

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

"Can you give me a haircut that says, 'If you mess with my budget I'll rip out your soul, wring it like a dish towel, and drink it from a teacup'?"

"I just..."

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

'I used to work for the Treasury Department, but there's no future in economic forecasts.'

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

"What comes after zillion?"

'Do you remember the good old days when April 15 was the only 'fiscal cliff' people worried about?'

Occupy Budget Balancing

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

'With 5% spent on talent, 5% on production, and 90% on marketing...I smell WINNER!'

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

You can't fool all of the people all of the time, especially with our advertising budget.

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

"The Treasury is fairly sure that the figures in the budget are correct, they might just not be in the right order!"

Your tax $ at WAR.

"So, the bills still aren't paid? You've never been good at money management."

'Wow, my own desk!'

"Hired! You're just what we need in our budget office!"

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

White House Garage Sale.

"I'm at that awkward stage between credit card payments and alimony payments."

'We've gone over your budget very carefully, Mr Thorne. Unfortunately the network does not sell 7-second spots.'

'What if we televise government budget hearings and make them pay-per-view?'

Overdraft limit.

'Our expenses have decreased 20 per cent since we started refilling our own ink jet cartridges.'

"There's so much money around now we've started using it as toilet paper."

Sales - We could try a 'free offer' but it would cost us.