Brave-exaggerator Gifts

'The needle was THIS big!'

Fishing Tales

'What a CV - if you can write memos like this you'll go far in our organisation.'

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

Alarmistclock

Early accounting scandals.

A plumber preparing to go under a house's dark crawl space sees many eyes looking back from the darkness.

'...and that's the one that got away!'

"Don't worry - you've got to expect a few midge bites on holiday..."

National Hyperbole Society: Inspirational & Outstanding

'You're an estate agent aren't you?'

"Lost his first hat about nine months ago. Really tore him up too."

'I gave him the old one-two, but then he gave me three, four, five, six, seven and eight!'

"Come check this out, Doris! I think our mouse trap finally caught a mouse!"

Fish Story

'When I said in my on-line profile that I was athletic, I meant that I like watching sports!'

"The fish gets bigger every time he tells the story."

"Don't be so dramatic, you've only got a cold!"

“At what point does it stop being just moths, and start being Pestilence?”

Remember, Ed, they are more afraid of you than you are of them.

Jeff hadn't quite anticipated how he'd feel exhibiting his art publicly for the first time.

"And that one I tagged with a flamethrower from ten yards."

'Oh, I would say it was at least twice that size, and it had fangs and horns too...'

"Okay. It's a balloon. Get over it."

'Yes, I did suggest you enlarge that photo of you and your car. However...'

"I stood up to the class bully like you said, Dad. . . then she punched me in the eye!"

'You were featured on Rogue Traders'

"When Dennis gets a cold everyone has to know about it"

"Hard work, determination, success!"

"I said it was INSPIRED by a true story."

"My wife took up walkin' a mile a day five years ago. Haven't seen her since!" "Lucky son of a..."

'I can tell this fish story just fine by myself, man's best friend.'

"You heard right, mom...the boss made me his plant manager!"

"It strikes me you're making a deal more fuss over this than it calls for, Dan'l."