Exaggeration Enthusiast Gifts

"Hard work, determination, success!"

'These young social workers now nothing, I used to see 5000 clients every day...'

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

"It strikes me you're making a deal more fuss over this than it calls for, Dan'l."

'Move back!'

"Don't worry - you've got to expect a few midge bites on holiday..."

'All my senses are very acute.'

'What a CV - if you can write memos like this you'll go far in our organisation.'

'I can tell this fish story just fine by myself, man's best friend.'

"Don't be so dramatic, you've only got a cold!"

National Hyperbole Society: Inspirational & Outstanding

'At Hyperbole Club'.

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

"Come check this out, Doris! I think our mouse trap finally caught a mouse!"

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Fishing Tales

"Pfff, eating homework is nothing! My mum eats the clothes off the clothes line..."

Alarmistclock

'Do you always have to shout? Well? Do you? Huh?'

Early accounting scandals.

"Here's your hourly job performance review."

SWAT Team (going in to catch a fly).

An exaggeration of estate agents

'You fancy yourself as a press baron, don't you?'

'...and that's the one that got away!'

"Lost his first hat about nine months ago. Really tore him up too."

"It came... it grew... it made Nana say bad words... 'Ow! You rotten #@!!×!' The invasion of the thistle"

Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Send your questions to asksadie@rudypark.com. Dear Ask Sadie, My mom is always nagging me to clean my room. I don't see why I should have to. I like it the way it is. I don't nag at her for having a clean room, because I know that's how she likes it. How can I get her to just let me be me? - Unhappy at Home. Excellent question. The thing is, it's your mother's job to shape you into a respectable person. If you think "being you" includes being dirt

"In your original statement, you said the fish was much bigger."

Fish Story

'I gave him the old one-two, but then he gave me three, four, five, six, seven and eight!'

'When I said in my on-line profile that I was athletic, I meant that I like watching sports!'

'This infestation is far more serious than I was anticipating.'

"The fish gets bigger every time he tells the story."

“At what point does it stop being just moths, and start being Pestilence?”