Bovine Bard Gifts

Cow Writers Block.

Cow writer.

If cows would write fairy tales...

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

"Babe, I'm gonna leave you... It may take a few eons, but I am definitely gonna leave you..."

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

'Yak, yak, yak.'

Motorherd

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

'It's a great film Pauline, I nearly milked myself laughing.'

Moo! OOM!

Shakespeare in the clink

'Someday, son, when I've gone to that big roundup in the sky all this will be yours.'

BOO MOO!

"You can achieve anything if you put you mind to it."

Grass: We lost some good men today!

Your Country Needs MOO!

The Cud Food Guide

Who are you?

Triple Sock Cow

"I think that I shall never see a tree on which I wouldn't pee."

'You don't want to show favouritism Bruce-it upsets the others.'

"She's at that age where she wants to know what pails are for."

I wrote a poem about our failure to capture and secure the highway. It's called "The Road Not taken."

'Be gentle with me!'

'Calm down. I heard them say we're just going into town for haircuts.'

"Oh, God, it's the Herefords, pretend we don't see them."

'Torville and Cow'.

'Don't worry about it. You're buying compulsion is perfectly normal.'

Stop! Mad cows are forbidden to cross the border!

"But the best thing about getting neutered, Gus, is that I'm finally able to focus on my novel-in-progress without any distractions!"

"I have four stomachs and one of them always seems to be hungry.''

'If he says 'got milk', I'm gonna bite.