Boating Humorist Gifts

Small boat, heavy anchor.

"I treated myself to a barge pole. I thought I'd push the boat out."

'Wait a second. Since when did they start making life jackets out of burlap?'

Emergency Sails.

reincarnated worm...

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

Japanese Whaling

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

Guide fish.

'Of course I brought the emergency flares.'

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

Lady to angler whose line is snagged: 'You would manage to get your line caught in the one tree in this entire massive lake.'

Man painting MOM on boat

'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

Walking the Plank.

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

"Is a six pack enough? I can go back out."

Raft with a 'Caution Wet!' sign.

Shark Chum

Another hot flash?