Blueprint Misreader Gifts

"'Sideboard'? I thought it said 'sideboob'."

"We only got six days of funding."

"This the first time you guys ever installed an above-ground pool?"

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

"Here's the parking lot."

We're putting on a subtraction.

'The project is a little behind schedule. It was proactive, now it's retroactive.'

'Frankly, I prefer the monkey's plans.'

"Please, James...will you stop worrying whether the baby will meet all government regulations!"

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

"This is just a model, but you get the idea."

"And nobody noticed the crease in the blueprint?"

"You see? You gotta turn it counter-clockwise."

'Soufle, can I have the blueprint?.'

"I'd consider taking out this appendix you'renot using and greatly expanding your kidney area."

'I'm no expert but at a guess I'd say they had the drawings upside down!'

'Okay. Now. Insert Part K into slot G...'

Cubits? Haven't You gone metric yet?

"Those knuckleheads!"

Builders build a property that has a crease in it like the design plan.

Builder follows an architect's blueprints exactly, including the smudges.

'Bill, you messed up again. You built the second floor on top of the third floor.'

'It's always the same design. I wish he'd get a more imaginative set of house plans.'

House building chart (like steps).

"And I'm telling YOU it looks exactly like the picture. See?"

Worker takes Boss out in a wheelbarrow

"Cheer up! Things are sure to get better."

After work, of course, they'd relax and talk deconstruction. Isn't a blueprint just a series of markings with no meaning by themselves? Our job, as I see it, is to find the true essence of the materials.

'I don't think that blob was an unusual roof design, but a coffee stain.'

"I don't know - seems like a lot of work."

"We need to think outside the pyramid."

'This shows where the swimming pool will be placed.'

Building site. 'Going to be a new tv station.'

Architect chained to his drawing of parliament

Designer