Bird Training Gifts

'Loook, lady, my name is Frank, not Polly, and I don't want no stinkin' cracker!'

'I can't keep a secret, either!'

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

'Trust me, there's nobody to rescue that way...'

bird interprets modern art

"I don't actually talk, I just mimic sounds."

'If he's only five years old, how come he knows the words to 'See the USA in your Chevrolet'?'

Bird about to dive from diving board into birdbath

Birds doing the 'wave'.

'May I speak to you alone, Cap'n?'

'Will you stop! You know that freaks me out!'

Pet Store. Bird Seed. "Bird Seed"? I thought they laid eggs.

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

Bird Watching with Binoculars

'I've lost the urge to repeat everything...'

A hunter hitting his first bird.

A man with a bird perched on his finger.

"Lovely robin ... though, I'm sensing a little attitude."

"Maybe I've been brainwashed, but at this point I do believe I actually want a goddamn cracker."

"Nice work, son. You missed the car but you nailed his bald spot."

"You fly into a window, too?"

Bird baths with two different kinds of water - sparkling and still.

Bird to psychologist: 'I have some deep-seeded issues.'

'Who called me a quack?' (boy has duck on his knee in vet's surgery).

Consider a Pet...someone with a bigger beak than me!

"Mating display of the white-bellied boobie"

Bird sees coo coo bird emerge from birdhouse

"He does impressions too!"

'We don't have to worry about African Killer Bees this far north.'

'My husband and I are real bird lovers.'

'Yes,I know, but where do you suppose I'm going to find a rhino around here?'

'I must admit I panicked when I first saw the low bone-density test results, but since you're a bird, it's all good!'

Bird watchers.

"Avoid eye contact. This guy's a real loon."

"Look! A rare flightless bird!"