Bikini Aficionado Gifts

Bikini Car Thieves $100

'But, honey, the girl in the bikini only adds to the awesomeness of my car.'

Golf ball lands in womans cleavage

'Nice material!'

"Everything goes right to my hips."

Periscope spies beautiful water-skier.

"Lets find another beach, this one has too much competition."

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

'We can't go in... we've only one 'pair of trunks' between us!'

Loofah Lady

"Underweird bras."

Summer wants.

Rod was unimpressed with the party - Sure, he was surrounded by bikini-clad lovelies, there was free champagne and a 20-foot jelly, but much to his chagrin, there was a distinct lack of cheese and pineapple chunks.

Happy Brithday

Mankini - One size fits all.

The only creation God was truly proud of was the Sabbath

"I keep telling him there's a big difference between swimming and floating."

'This one has been banned in Benidorm.'

Easter Island

Kid's Driving You Crazy?

Two piece outfits only.

'Muriel had a traumatic experience at a topless beach -- she was sunbathing, and a toddler attacked her.'

'Hey Dave, check out the kinky underwear this chick is taking on her trip!'

"He'll do anything to get his underwear sponsors a mention!"

'Honestly, Clara, that bikini leaves little to the imagination And how long are you going to stand there, holding your stomachs in'

'Your bath's ready, dear. You may want to run some cold water before you get in'.

"How come more men seem to get into difficulty when we're on life guard duty?"

'Thanks to your bikini, we should make land by nightfall.'

"It's so drapey—should I get something with a crisper line?"

'Remind me again, are we hopeless old has-beens or fashionable retro?'

'She certainly gets a lot out of her bikini.'

'Don't worry. We'll fit into these things by spring.'

Husband's sudden interest in Aquafit is all because of the sexy instructor.

Jacuzzi

'Is this the way to the beach?'