Big Business Skeptic Gifts

"First Big Oil, the Big Steel, and now, Big Cookie."

'Looks like the cable merger is concentrating too much market in one telecommunications giant.'

Emperor Trump gives a thumbs down to a polar bear

Welcome! We're the big box store that never forgets your face.

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

The Solar System (after deregulation)

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

"If CEO pay packets aren't a problem, why doesn't everyone get one?"

'We raised the price, so at least as far as we're concerned it's new and improved.'

"Neversource"

"And once we wipe out the disease, where does that leave us?"

"But they told me I was too big to fail."

"Get someone to make the slot bigger."

"Guess what, Collins? Not my job to remember what I said yesterday."

'Dear sir, thank you for your idea of a helicopter ejection-seat, but...'

"Do you want to ruin me?! Take it away!!"

'Today the house voted for a timeline, the sentate voted for benchmarks, and Halliburton voted for staying the course.'

'If there's one thing I've learnt being a manager,it's taking credit where it isn't due!'

With-it Woman

"My kid could have done that with AI."

Hey boss, that generic soap you gave me isn't really cleaning the cups. Mind if I go get some brand name stuff? Are you insane? There's zero difference between generic and brand name products. Corporate America just cons people into thinking "you get what you pay for." Don't be a stooge, Rudy. Don't fall for it. Now get in there and scrub those cups, minion! Strike a blow for the little guy against corporate lies! Wait ... I'm very confused. Are you a right-winger or a left-winger? You mean in w

"He's our new trend-spotter?"

Our Mission: "Who are we trying to kid? It's just one day at a time around here!"

Facebook in Crisis

Profit can be a silly thing, but your boss thinks it is everything.

'Downsizing through attrition will work if enough employees will cooperate and die.'

"It's really a lateral transfer, Crampton, From 'Nobody' to 'Flunkie'."

'Perhaps we would be better off with fewer fans on Facebook and Twitter, and more on Visa and Mastercard!'

Bank. 18 month CD 1.0815255645% Paying More digits than any other bank. Interest rates are so low! It's hard to believe this CD has reached maturity --- Just look at how little it's grown! Investing seems extremely risky these days. There's no safe place to get a decent return. They always say investing is a roller coaster. Yeah, but it's not true. On a roller coaster you get back to where you started!

'Well, if you consider normal corporate surveillance, interrogation, and harassment 'union-busting,', nothing I have to say will change your mind.'

'It isn't that we don't have high technology. We don't have any technology.'

'Hi Mr Miller, this is the employee opinion poll. Here's the question: 'Do you love your job, your boss and the company?' For answer A, 'Yes, I do and I want to do much more unpaid overtime', please press 1. For answer B, 'No, I don't and you can fire me'

'This bottle stainless steel cleaner...if it's stainless...why would you need a cleaner?'

'And once we wipe out the disease, where does that leave us?'