Biblical Tales Fan Gifts

"Bad news - the unicorns are gay."

"Remember if anyone there asks... We're all from one household!"

'This isn't the flood Noah, this is just normal Bank Holiday weather.'

'Be honest Adam, do these leaves make me look fat?'

'Folks, there's been a slight delay in our time of arrival...we won't be landing for about another 40 years.'

"...I'll send you for an amniocentesis."

Curiously unashamed of his nakedness Adam takes to streaking.

Joseph and his coat

"But Moses, if I let your people go I'll have to let everybody's people go."

"You know, after all we've been through, I was kind of expecting to hear something about slavery."

'I don't know...where are you going to keep your mobile phone?'

'Bloody hell, Delilah - cornrows!?'

'Damn, we forgot to cancel the book of the month!'

'Things are gonna change now that I'm here! I want this place spotless! Do you hear me, Adam?'

Joseph and Mary at the inn for Christmas

'The serpent was rotten to the core, but the apple was delicious.'

"Ralph, have you noticed the other pairs are male and female?"

Jesus makes water cooler water into wine.

Use of a Dead Cat in History: The Original Cast

Moses Before Pharaoh's Daughter.

"Plagues are old-school – we're going to hit you with sanctions."

First, the horses already boarded, and second, I know you're the Johnsons.

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

Church Library - Pop-Up Books

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

'Great cruise. When does the buffet open?'

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

Noah's Ark/Single's Cruise

Sistine Selfie

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

'Well, your photosynthetic stuff was a lot more peaceful.'

Eden. Hi, I'm version 2.0.