Bible Stories Fan Gifts

'Wouldn't you know it!'

Eve makes a discovery with far reaching ramifications. Our star signs aren't compatible.

'I can ask, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't do breast enhancements.'

Reconciling Science and Religion

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

". . . I called this meeting to communicate that I had dinner Noah..."

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

'Great cruise. When does the buffet open?'

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

Sistine Selfie

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

Paul was Generally Considered the Cutest Apostle

'Well, your photosynthetic stuff was a lot more peaceful.'

'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'

Three Wise Men Fancy Dress.

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Joseph and his coat

"Hey samson, nice man bun."

"I can never remember if it's smite or smote."

"Remember if anyone there asks... We're all from one household!"

Moses' TV guide.

Bloke orders a pizza as Jesus divides the loafs and fishes

"...I'll send you for an amniocentesis."

"We don't see ourselves as either a David or a Goliath. We're content to just be the company that manufactures the sling shots."

'We'd better speed up the Eve project -- Adam's got himself an imaginary playmate.'

"...and Adam and Eve were naked, so they had to leave the garden."

"Plagues are old-school – we're going to hit you with sanctions."