Biblical Story Aficionado Gifts

"Nothing about separation of church and state?"

'What do you guys think? Adam and Eve, or Eve and Adam?'

The Unicorns are gay.

The first recorded case of overbooking: Noah having to leave the Unicorns behind.

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: 'I ran out of pebbles.'

Why are direction signs always so bad?

"...and with The Jonah you get your choice of krill or fries."

"Hopefully our species will survive this cruise."

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

Church Library - Pop-Up Books

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

"I've told you before one at each end!"

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

'Great cruise. When does the buffet open?'

". . . I called this meeting to communicate that I had dinner Noah..."

"If this Goliath bloke is as big as they say, I can just hang around the forest until he's gone."

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

Paul was Generally Considered the Cutest Apostle

Regifts of the Magi

'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'

"I can never remember if it's smite or smote."

''Tree of Knowledge,' eh? - Has it been fact-checked?'

"If Noah asks... Just tell him you've all had your vaccinations."

Adam and Eve in Paradise

Bloke orders a pizza as Jesus divides the loafs and fishes

"When you get a minute, I have some kitchen shelves you can put up."

Moses' TV guide.

"Daniel, I seem to have dropped my keys, could you look around and toss them up."