Biblical Connoisseur Gifts

'The meek shall inherit the Earth!'

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

Adam names the animals (He puts sticky notes on them saying Shaz, Dave, Trish etc).

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

'Hey, wait a minute...Apples aren't indigenous to this geopraphical region.'

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

Ten Commandments

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

Moses as a child.

Noah's ark, many lions

Christian and Born again Christian...

"Hurry! Let's go! The world will be better off without his kind."

The First Printed Bible

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

'Sorry mate. Your church doesn't meet the minimum building code.'

"Wow, Jesus. That lesson rocked, someone should write this stuff down."

"As a child of the pastor, did you stop and think that just because you can belch the books of the Bible, should you?"

Adam and Eve, as old people.

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

Meet the Author

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

'If you're omnipresent, why do I always have to climb way up here?'

"We're in luck, not a word about retrospectivity."

File Cabinets for Perfectionists

Paul was Generally Considered the Cutest Apostle

Jerry Springer of biblical times.

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'

'Please Miss, is it where Noah kept his bees?'

Rocket Ark

'Let your people go? - after all the trouble I went to getting them full employment?'

Man frozen in portrait pose.