Bible Gifts

'Darn -- I forgot to ask Him if the Sabbath is Saturday or Sunday!'

"Sorry Buddy, no singles!"

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

'Okay, now...while holding down the commandment key, type in the number ten.'

The Noah's Ark Conspiracy Theory: 'He built what? Oh, well that's just great...Now I have to figure out what to do with it and start all over.'

'If there was one thing Methusela hated. It was his Birthday bumps.

'But listen, Adam, who could we ask to be the Best Man?'

"Is there an audio edition?"

"Hi. I'm Rod. And this is my staff."

"Could you speed it up a little, the 'Seinfeld' marathon starts in five minutes."

"Reverend, I recommend you turn the other cheek."

God creates Adam.

Eden's computer

'Manna from heaven puts the olfactory talents of Israel's dogs to the test.'

'This doesn't have anything to do with your performances, we need to make some cuts so we'll be able to stay afloat.'

Noah's Arc Gift Shop

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Jesus has a Practice Before Raising Lazarus.

David and Goliath, the rift begins,

'Joe gives 'em the bad news, and I give 'em the good news, just like 'good cop - bad cop'!'

'Uh, You know that honor system you worked out with Adam and Eve?...'

'Now Test Your Brakes.'

"A reading from the first letter of Paul to the Corinthians..."

Old Testament - Methuselah has a car accident

"Give Me 6 Sets At 30 Seconds Each!"

The expulsion from the Garden of Olive.

"Cheer up, Keith - I'm sure they'll build a singles ark!"

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

Moses separating his Laundry.

Moses on the web

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."