Benefit Enthusiasts Gifts

I hope that answers your questions about the wages, annual bonus, pension plan....Now don't you want to know something about the job?

"Oh I have plenty of sex appeal. It's all here in my bank baalance."

"Now that's how to declare a dividend!"

Pre-Old Blues

"Today we welcome back an old friend."

"A good quarter is a joy forever."

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

'Miss Henshaw - bring me my trumpet.'

Todays Sermon: 'Can our entitlements be saved?'

"R&D really created a miracle drug this time...at least it's been miraculous for our bottom line!"

"I think he's been capitalised!"

And this is my dance of the third quarters profit ratio.

"This data shows us that we are going up to a new level."

'I do my best work when I'm being paid a huge salary.'

'Say what you like about Capitalism, it makes the gravy train run on time.'

'Amy, cancel all my appointments. I have enough money.'

We don't think your 12 million dollar bonus is obscene. We think it's 12 million little ways to say 'I love you.'

'Harold's grandfather was one of the inventors of the hula-hoop.'

Making Money.

Delighted worker being propelled through the air on the back of the scale coming right off the chart

'You're addicted to big bonuses. But the good news is there's a patch to treat that.'

'I'm appalled, the bank's limited my bonus to 'grossly sickening' when I've earned 'outrageous'.'

'We're with you half way, sir. We'll return our government bailout if we can keep our executive bonuses.'

What do you MEAN money isn't everything? We are a bank!

'The position carries no salary but does provide for full medical and dental coverage, with three weeks vacation.'

'I don't need your love. I need a 401 (k) and health insurance.'

'We're going to wander in the desert for forty years? What about portability of benefits?'

"There's a one-year don't-get-sick probation period for our health insurance."

'Getting a big bonus to risk other people's money makes me wonder if I am part of a conspiracy.'

"Beneath this calm exterior, I'm obsessed with making profits."

'We've ended up paying our 'golden hellos', golden 'return from holidays' and Prickman wanted a golden 'thank you' after coming back from a toilet break!'

You wanted to see me again, boss? Yes. I realized you never gave me my Christmas bonus. What're you talking about? You're the boss. You give me a bonus, I don't give you a bonus. Exactly. The key word in employer-employee relationship is relationship. One-sided relationships never work, Rudy. I've calculated the amount you would have paid me if you hadn't been taking me for granted for 16 years. Very bad man.

'You're offering me a job, eh? -- does it have portable benefits?'

"Sure, revenues are up 25% since we switched from blackmailing the West, to crowdfunding, but where's the pizazz?"

"So this 'customer care' idea seems to be working."