Bedroom Banter Fan Gifts

"That's kingsize?"

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

What's that? - 'It's a mosquito bite.' - 'Scratch it!' - 'No, I need to buy some cream.' - 'Make it bleed!!!' - 'Gahhh!!!' -

Fly fishing.

"There's a conversation to be had around a piece of work I'd like us to do tonight."

"If you are a Democrat, Mrs. Hooper-Smith does the Macarena during your pancakes."

'I have a master's in 17th century Dutch feminist poetry, but I've never really used it.'

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

"We'll get what we need from you. Guaranteed!" "Officer Madoff, the best stool softener on the force."

'I'm terribly sorry. I thought it said 'gods'.'

Confessional bathroom

'You're listening to no repeat radio where we never play the same song twice! Yeah! No repeat radio! Where you'll never hear the same song twice! Only on no repeat radio!'

"What I drink and what I tell the pollsters I drink are two different things."

Jungle dweller swings from outhouse with toilet paper stuck to his foot.

Bed & Breakfast

"Yeah, I'm selling my bowling balls. Free delivery to anyone who lives downhill."

Time stood still – which made it an easy target.

A couple with dog look at restroom signs of a man, a woman, and a fire hydrant.

"Looks like it's going to be a nice day."

"So when you said you were a bee keeper..."

'Don't go near the sludge!'

Dead & Breakfast.

"It was meant as a compliment. In my eyes, you're a real pig."

Hand takes a shower,

Propriety

'At least I get my stretching exercises done when I use the restroom here.'

Can you feel the electricity in the air?...

'So...your Bowel or mine?' / A male tapeworm using a pick-up line on a female tapeworm

The Forgotten Men's Club

"Oh year?! Well, MY daddy is the largest of the largest animal species on earth!"

You throw poop like a girl.

'Honestly, if you're looking in Loch Ness you're way off!'

Monster Bathrooms.

Mermaid Portaloo.

'Quit the act? That's not you, boss--that's the drink talking.'