Beachside Jokers Gifts

'I wanted a burial service, he wanted cremation, so I decided to compromise and have him clambaked.'

'I don't remember this canoe being this heavy, do you Tom?'

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

Brighton Bersagliere.

"Dad! I can't believe we come to the beach and you set up all the way out here! I can barely see the ocean...we're so far from the wa..."

Mankini - One size fits all.

"George, I think factor 50 would probably be enough."

"Like you, I'm a bit of a glutton, but I need to monitor my food intake otherwise I could be too heavy to fly..."

'I think its being tapped.'

"It's my wife - she's trying to lure ships to their doom!"

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

Death Takes A Time-Share

'Shall we dig him up, we haven't had an ice cream in over an hour?'

'I'm in hock up to my ears, I work in a dead-end job for eight bucks an hour, my wife and girlfriend are both pregnant - and you think you need help!'

Pass the SPF 20,000

"Not exactly a snowman!"

Why do men wear long short pants?

"All you cockroaches, …. When he tries to listen to the ocean, … run as fast as you can into his ear."

'Sorry, ocean sounds can't be heard due to a computer glitch.'

Bomb's Away

'I am wearing my bikini!'

'That would be way embarrassing.'

Tsunami Selfie

'A working vacation, your honor?'

How to fool a seagull

"Wow, cool fangs! Are you a vampire too?"

'Last week he gave me artificial recreation.'

'POSTED! TOPLESS BATHERS ONLY BEYOND THIS POINT!'

"Wow! These birds are getting clever."

'Whoah - surfs up!'

EU: Legal Labelling Requirements for Meat!

"Not only are you in violation of the city nude beach ordinance....I also believe that shell is on the endangered species list."

"Run for your lives! The sea level is rising at the rate of about 1 foot per century!"

'If it's not bothering you, I wouldn't bother having it removed.'

'Now remember, smile and try and wiggle 'em.' - The discarded box is labelled Falsies.