Baseball Comedy Gifts

'Anyone else want to get up and leave before the game is over?'

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'Oh, and this ringtone is an app that alerts me when a fly ball is headed my way.'

Dedication to excellence....

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

You'll understand after you see him pitch.

"...They must be poor catchers, there's two men behind the plate."

The Puck Stops Here.

"Idiot! I signaled for a sinker!"

Discus accidents.

Expansion 2000: The Baton Rouge Ball Boys

'He looks great in the field, but can he bat?'

'Now, Perkins, hit my ball straight down the fairway for about 300 yards.'

Shows Bundt

'No way, man! Murphy isn't worth anywhere near the 3.5 million they're paying him!'

'Sit down, Roger! You're creating drag.'

'So much for the question of whether of whether or not a curveball really curves.'

'Go get the hose, George! That gopher is back!'

'He hits better against right handed pitching, so pitch left-handed, to him.'

In addition to players, some major league umpires are suspected of using steroids.

You're not supposed to lob the rock!

"OK maybe we should try a different sport."

'Yo, Bob! I think a heckler just nailed me with something. What's on my back?'

Baseball contract signing gloves.

'Get over it, Brady. Pitchers at this level are expected to get batters out. Randy there gave up eight runs in one inning...'

'...The athletic trainer's coming with the WD-40.'

Before baseball, raccooning enjoyed a brief stint as the national pastime.

You're right. He's gonna throw the change-up.

'He's the long shot!'

'Nice throw...'

"Things are going well, so I may as well ask: how about those Mets? Ha-ha, just kidding. The tail. Please fix this tail thing."

Baseball player: 'I'll let my bat do my talking!' BAT: '...I have nothing to say'

"Now they'll never know who's on first."

"Thats for missing the bunt sign!" "Yeah, and that's for striking out on ball four, you loser!"